Not So Wordless Wednesday

Life has been insanely busy with the toddler being in her "terrific twos", me teaching, having students at the house with us for the summer, the farm, the freelance work, extra-curricular activities, committees...just to name a few things.

I had to bring the toddler to a meeting last week since I couldn't find childcare at the last minute. She was great, except for the constant wanting me to play with her and read her books. This, my friends, is why it's really not recommended to take little ones to your meetings. It's distracting and can sometimes prove to be unproductive. She was so good, but it really is a lot to ask of a 2.5 year old to sit and stay occupied for an adult meeting. Of course, she had toys and books to keep her busy with, but nothing is ever as good as having Mommy play too. *sigh*

Secret Mommy Confession:  After the meeting, I was almost in tears. I asked some of the other women there how on earth women survive?! We work all day at our jobs, work all evening and night at our home and take care of our families, we don't get much sleep, we don't get many breaks. How do women survive? Better yet, how do women not burn out or go nuts? Oh, I'm totally not joking.

Little One is simply adorable and I love her so  much. She's just into everything and she's so busy all the time! Sometimes, I wonder if having children earlier in life would have been easier? Then I think of all the things I know now and all the experience I have as *gasp* (dare I say it?) an "older mom". I just don't seem to have the energy I had when I was in my twenties. I'm 35 and Little One is just over 2.5 years old.

I find my patience wears thin really easily after a long day of teaching. I want to just soak up all my time with her and enjoy her at this age, but after racing home from teaching, there's supper to be made, work to do around the  house, and a whole slew of other things to do. It pains me to feel like I am not giving her all my time when I am at home.

I need to go to Zumba and exercise classes during the week because A) I need and love the exercise and B) That hour of working out refreshes me and gives me a break from the whining and acting out. Sadly, my little munchkin has become very whiny for her mommy and is very vocal about her wants and her dislikes. Though I know that working out is good for me, I feel really guilty (not always self-imposed) for taking a few nights a week away from my toddler.

Then I have friends who seem to be so "together" with the whole parenting thing. They don't complain, voice their frustrations, fall apart, or feel like crying sometimes. At least, they give that illusion. My close friends and I feel comfortable enough to talk about everything we are going through and how we really feel. The SuperMoms out there just make me feel like a completely awful mom for losing it sometimes.

I'm just so exhausted all the time.

Thankfully, despite the whole whiny, cranky, bossy attitude from Little One sometimes, on the whole, she is an awesome kid. She's so inquisitive, loving, sweet, smart, funny, and my everything. I just wish I could be more patient, not worry about cooking, getting housework done, and doing other things. I don't want her to remember me losing it or being stressed out at the state of our house all the time. When she gets older, I want her to remember that I read to her every night (book after book...after book!), sang with her, played outside with her, coloured with her, and took  her to cool places. I want her to remember all of these things. I really am making an effort to not be "that crabby mom" who is overly concerned with how immaculate the house is. I can't  help how much it bothers me that the house is suffering since I've gotten so busy with everything.

How on earth do some moms have it so "together" all the time? 

I hope Little One does know how much I love her and how much the time we spend together means to me. I  hope she always remembers the time we spend on the beach together.

It's Been Five Years...

Happy Anniversary, Hubby! Here's to many more wonderful years together.

Happiness is...

As we approached High Park, my heart began to race with excitement and anticipation. In the distance, I could see the big bouncy castles and hear the children's laughter. The park was filled with families and their NICU graduates. I wasn't sure what to expect with this being the first Mount Sinai Hospital NICU Graduates Picnic we were able to attend.

I felt overwhelmed with happiness. All these families who had spent long days, weeks, and even months in the NICU were all together in one place, sharing in the celebration of all the babies who were in the NICU. The appreciation and thankfulness I felt for the doctors, nurses, staff, volunteers, and other families cannot be expressed in words. There are no words to adequately describe how I feel.

Tears poured, as hugs were exchanged. "Thank you for being there and helping us get through some of the hardest times we've ever had to experience" and "I don't know what I would have done if  you weren't in the NICU with me" could be heard by many of the parents. We all shared like experiences. We all had special little miracles. Some were born just over a pound at birth and are now happy, healthy, busy toddlers.


To be honest, though one can never forget those early days in the NICU, as the years pass and Little One grows, it all seems so surreal that we went through all of the scary, rocky times in our baby's first months. Little One is two and a half years old now! The date on this photo is wrong. It should have been November 19, 2008.

Being able to see the people who spent time in the NICU with us when Little One was there just brought back so many memories. It was a celebration, a reunion, and just a very happy occasion.

Little One is a healthy child. Developmentally, she is just like any other toddler her age. She is just a regular kid, but who had a rocky start.

 

It was fantastic to see all the preemies who were in the NICU with Little One. I cannot believe how much they've all grown! They are all doing so well! No photos of the picnic or families and children who attended the picnic will be posted on here (due to privacy reasons).

Thank you to everyone involved in making the Preemie Graduates Picnic 2011 a very memorable one.
* Photos of Little One at the picnic courtesy of the talented  www.beyondinfinitiphotography.com :) Thank you!

Oh. My. Goodness.

If you haven't visited this beautiful island I live on, you'll want to come visit us after checking this out! I promise that you won't be disappointed!

Head on over to my other blog to see what delectable treats await you there! :)