Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Wedding Etiquette


Lately I've had a few questions floating in the back of my mind regarding wedding etiquette. I've left a question or two on Jill's blog, and she's got lots of really good answers. This girl is very reliable and well-informed on virtually everything. What do the rest of you think with regards to the following?

1. I've received a few wedding invitations for this year, but because of the work we do, John and I cannot go anywhere until the off-season and one or two of the weddings we were invited to are around the same time as our own wedding. So...even if one does not attend a wedding, is it necessary to buy the couple a gift?

2. Gift registries: practical or tacky? I'm personally a huge advocate for gift registries. I think at least this way a couple can get something they need. We're registered at Sears and Canadian Tire. Since J and I have lived on our own before, we both have almost everything we need for the house - which is why some of our gifts on our registries are so lame! Anyway, what's the general consensus on gift registries out there? I love hearing everyone's opinions on these sorts of questions.

3. What size bridal party did you have? Who did you include? Was it difficult to choose? Did you feel like you were leaving anyone out? I'm excited and can't wait for our wedding. I love all the girls in my bridal party and couldn't think of a better bunch of gals :) They're going to be so gorgeous in their dresses!!!

4. What gifts did you give your attendants? We've already chosen our bridal party's gifts.

5. What gifts did you give your parents and your hubby's parents? Still not sure on this one.

6. What gift did you give your husband-to-be? Did you write him a sweet little note too? Was it given the night before or the day of the wedding?

7. What gift for the bride did your hubby give you?

Well, those are all the questions on etiquette I've got so far. Hope you enjoy reading this crazy blog and please leave your comments because I love reading them.

Off to shower (just worked out) and then we're off to Sudbury. I love going on day trips with J, even if it's work related :)

5 comments:

Jill said...

1. I've received a few wedding invitations for this year, but because of the work we do, John and I cannot go anywhere until the off-season and one or two of the weddings we were invited to are around the same time as our own wedding. So...even if one does not attend a wedding, is it necessary to buy the couple a gift?
IMO, it is not necessary, but it is nice to send something small.

2. Gift registries: practical or tacky? I'm personally a huge advocate for gift registries. I think at least this way a couple can get something they need. We're registered at Sears and Canadian Tire. Since J and I have lived on our own before, we both have almost everything we need for the house - which is why some of our gifts on our registries are so lame! Anyway, what's the general consensus on gift registries out there? I love hearing everyone's opinions on these sorts of questions. I like them. It is much easier to buy a gift if you knw what the couple likes and wants. Also, if you don't know the couple very well and have not been to their home, it is hard to buy for them.

3. What size bridal party did you have? Who did you include? Was it difficult to choose? Did you feel like you were leaving anyone out? I'm excited and can't wait for our wedding. I love all the girls in my bridal party and couldn't think of a better bunch of gals :) They're going to be so gorgeous in their dresses!!! I had 4. My best friend, and my husband's sister and sister in law, and my cousin who I am close too. But it is personal. I didn't have a lot of close girlfriends and have no sister or SIL of my own, or it would have been bigger. But 4 was good-not tiny or huge!!

4. What gifts did you give your attendants? We've already chosen our bridal party's gifts. I gave my all my girls picture frames (different ones, suited to their taste) except my MOH, who I got crystal bracelets for. The guys all got Pottery Barn Martini Shakers.

5. What gifts did you give your parents and your hubby's parents? Still not sure on this one. We didn't. I had no idea we were supposed to

6. What gift did you give your husband-to-be? Did you write him a sweet little note too? Was it given the night before or the day of the wedding?
We gave each other rings, and ourselves. Oh, and oral. Why we would give each other gifts, when we are giving each other the most important thing we have to give already (our hearts), is beyond me!!!

7. What gift for the bride did your hubby give you? See above

Dani said...

1. I agree with Jill, I recieved a few invitations close to our wedding and a couple just around the time the baby will be born, It is not necessary to buy something,but its always nice to send a note or something small so that they know you were thinking of them.

2. I like the gift registry idea, even if we had it and we wanted new or something we would never buy ourselves we put it down.

3.I had 8 bridesmaids. I had my BF as my maid of honor, my SIL, and then my closest friends who I have known for a very long time. Some for over 20 years. Even though it seems a lot it was beautiful and it didn't take long for them to walk down. Jeff had 9 ushers. They all walked seperate and then the Bridesmaids and ushers came up 2 at a time.

4. I gave each of my bridesmaids an earring and necklace set to wear on the day if they wanted, I gave my sister in law a necklace. Jeff gave engraved pen and pencil sets to each of his ushers.

5. We didn't give our parents anything.. They have a grandchild coming:)

6&7 Jeff and I didn't give each other anything, as Jill said we were giving ourselves and the rings and the promise to be with one another through thick and thin.

Chrissy121875 said...

Thanks girls,for youe input! :)

Dina said...

To answer some of your questions...
1. I have always thought it is nice to send a small gift even if you can't attend the wedding. Usually something smaller than if you had actually gone.

2. VERY PRACTICAL. It makes it much easier for people to choose a gift for you AND you can put things down you may not choose for yourselves. It is tackier when people expect cash gifts (i have actually seen some people put right on the invite- Cash gifts only- VERY tacky- and I would end up giving a gift if I saw that on the invite!)

3. We each had 4 people march for us. I had my 2 closest friends and 2 of my sisters-in-law. The other SIL would have marched had she not been 8.5 months pregnant at the time.I also had a junior BM and a flower girl (my 2 cousins) Gavin had 3 of his closest friends and my brother. IMO the bridal party should consist of the people you are closest to and of course family.

4. I gave each of my BM's Victoria Secret Bath products. They did a lot of work on putting together a wonderful shower for me and I thanked them afterwards by giving them the bridal party gift at that time. I gave my SIL a pretty bracelet I got at the one-of-a-kind show. Later I gave my MOH a frame with a picture of us from the wedding.
Gavin gave each of his ushers a book he personally picked out for them based on their individual interests ie. one on race cars for my brother, one on soccer for another etc...

5. I know we gave them each something but for the life of me I can't remember what...I know my brother and his wife gave my parents this beautiful blessing for the house in hebrew scripture and they gave her parents a stunning silver wine decanter for the sabbath.

6. We bought each other our wedding rings, and the wedding altogether was our gifts to each other...we could have gone to get married on a beach somewhere but decided to do the wdding for ourselves!

7. Same as 6.

Hope this helps!!

5.

Chrissy121875 said...

Thanks again, girls! As always, you've been a tremendous help! Dina, I know what you mean about some people putting "cash only" on the invitations! Tacky! I think it's actually quite rude and quite presumptuous. I know a couple probably needs money to start off their new lives together, but I still think it's a bit of a faux pas. Of course, that's my opinion only. We know a couple who wrote "monetary gifts only, please" on their invites and used that for their honeymoon...but still! Again with the registries, at least the couple will get something they need or want, since they picked it out themselves. It ruins the risk of getting something they'll never use or keep in the back of their closet forever.

For us, all we ask for is that our favorite and closest friends and family are with us to share our special day *Dina, still keeping my fingers crossed that you and Gav can make it!!*. John and I have spoken and don't want friends or family to get us anything. What's important is everyone's presence. Sounds cheesy, but true. We've got a house, we;ve got stuff to fill a house, and we've got each other...ahhh quel fromage! LOL

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City girl moves to the country, falls in love, and marries a farmer. She tries to incorporate her city ways with her new country lifestyle and blogs to keep in touch with friends, family & students who live far, far away :) Can this city girl go country? Watch as she learns all sorts of exciting things about life on the farm and in a small rural community. *UPDATE* We are now parents! Our baby girl was born on Nov. 11, 2008 (at 28 weeks gestation- 12 weeks premature, but she's quite the trooper)!!!
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