The end of NaBloPoMo, that is!
Yes, another November has flown by. Another NaBloPoMo accomplished.

Though writing a post a day for an entire month has been a good way for me to come to certain realizations about myself and has awakened thoughts inside of me, I have to say that I think I will return to my regular one post every few days. Thank you very much.

What I've learned:

I need to vent more. I've always reserved my venting, ranting, and expressing gripes and grievances. Why? Well, I've always felt that no one wants to listen to a complainer. I don't like listening to negative people all the time. This said, I've learned that it's okay to sometimes express yourself even if your opinion is not always positive. Let's face it. We can't always be positive and happy all the time. Sometimes we need to let things out. Otherwise we'd explode.

I need to chill out. I have to reassess my priorities. Do I want to obsess about a clean  house all the time? This is something that I've been trying to work on for years. I'm constantly cleaning, disinfecting, tidying, rearranging...and if something isn't the way I expect it to be, I get stressed out. My daughter needs and wants me to spend more time with her and less time cleaning. It struck me the other day when she started crying, "Mama! Don't wash dishes! Don't wash dishes! You're always washing dishes!"
I keep saying that time spent with my Little One is so very important and that I don't want to miss out on her formative years, yet I sometimes tell her to play with her toys or look at her books so I can clean up after everyone. That really hit me. It made me sad. This has got to change.
I also learned that though things may not always be perfect and I may sometimes get frustrated with the difficulties of rural living, I have got it pretty good. I have so much to be thankful for.

Sure, we live in an old farm house and it isn't as modern or doesn't really measure up to my family's expectations, standards, or what we are accustomed to, our home is where we love to be. It's "home". Hubby and I work very hard, and though renovations may take years to complete, we are doing things little by little. People have said, "Why don't you just tear down your house and start anew? You can get those pre-fab houses and move in as is."

The thing is, though I sometimes complain...express my displeasure...say my house drives me crazy because it always needs some kind of work done, it needs another bathroom, or maybe even finish up the basement completely, I really, truly, honestly love it. It's got character. It's warm and inviting. It's a place where family and friends gather.





Hopefully the end of this year's NaBloPoMo also brings the end of me living in the dark with regard to some of the things I've neglected to realize.

Truth be known, my husband has an aversion to any recipe that does not contain meat. Oh, he'll eat whatever I serve him, if he knows what's good for him! Just kidding. He's pretty open-minded and will try anything and everything I serve him. Tofu just isn't one of those things. Though he likes how I season them and infuse certain flavours in the tofu dishes, he claims that that palatability is just not for him. Fair enough.

I grew up eating tofu on a somewhat regular basis. Since my Dad is Chinese Caribbean, we are no strangers to tofu. Tofu is a common ingredient in many Asian dishes. Also, as a vegetarian for most of my adult life, tofu was a mainstay in my diet.

Tonight, I was craving tofu for supper. A friend of mine from university (we were both vegetarian and involved in some environmental groups together) had this amazing tofu recipe that called for chili flakes and other ingredients I cannot remember. It was a sweet yet spicy tofu dish. Since I couldn't recall the exact recipe, I had to improvise.

First, I poured over some of my favourite cookbooks in hopes of finding something similar to the recipe I had in mind.
So many tempting recipes, but not exactly what I had in mind. I was left up to my own devices for this one.

For supper, we had Tofu Satay on rice noodles with steamed Bok Choy drizzled with sesame oil and Lychee milkshakes and chilled Lychee for dessert.

Please keep in mind that I rarely measure ingredients when it comes to cooking dishes (except for baking, where exact measurements are a must).

C's Tofu Satay on Rice Noodles
Ingredients:
1 or 2 packages of firm tofu, cubed (depending on how many people you're feeding)
1 sweet red pepper, diced
1 yellow pepper, diced
1 onion, chopped
cooking oil
Cilantro, chopped (to garnish)

Sauce -
vinegar
soy sauce
chili flakes
dash chili powder
onion powder
garlic powder
3 Tbsp peanut butter
After you've prepared your tofu and your veg, cook tofu in a pan with a little oil until slightly browned. Add your veggies and cook with sauce.

While you do this, you can steam your Bok Choy and rice noodles. This whole meal takes less than 30 minutes to make from prep to finish.

My non-tofu-eating husband said this was the best tofu dish he's had so far. He really liked the combination of sweet and spicy (sweetness from the peanut butter and heat from the chili).

On bed of rice noodles, place tofu satay. Sprinkle with chopped coriander to garnish. Drizzle sesame oil over Bok Choy and serve.

This post is cross-posted here because I am super lazy tired to post on more than one blog today :)

Every year for the past few years, I've been participating in NaBloPoMo. For National Blog Posting Month, gluttons for punishment bloggers challenge themselves to write a blog post every day for an entire month.

Me, being the once or twice a week blogger that I am, I find it quite challenging to come up with good content to post every day. I have to admit, that this year has been the toughest for me. So many other things have been keeping my mind away from posting every day. This said, I am the kind of person who has a guilty conscience and I always have to live up to my word. I've been posting every day, but the content has been quite shoddy. I cannot tell you how many times I've just come in under the wire with my posts.

Why do I participate in NaBloPoMo every year?

Well, I love challenges. There's a sense of accomplishment at the end. I can say, "Yeah, I did it. It was difficult, but I did it."

It's also a way for me to express myself. It allows for a creative outlet and my blog is a place of my own. Being a mom, wife, teacher, and many other things, I find I don't have anything that is my own anymore. This is something that is just for me.

I've also met lots of wonderful bloggers through the years via NaBloPoMo. Friendships have been formed. Support networks, contacts for work, and other blog/social media relationships have been made through blogging.

For all of you participating in NaBloPoMo, why do you do it?

Oh, I also received two awards this month! Actually, they're the same award, but given to me by two new-to-me bloggers I met while taking part in NaBloPoMo. I'd like to thank Steph from Educational Anarchy and Taylor from Goings on out in West Texas for sharing the bloggy love and giving me this:


"Liebster" is a German word meaning dearest and the award is given to up-and-coming bloggers with less than 200 followers.  

This is how it works:

Here are my 5 picks:

* Dairy Daze - You have become such a special part of our lives. Sharing in our ups and downs from miles away, you've been such a great friend. Plus, being a "reformed city girl turned farmer's wife", you understand when I say how crazy the cattle can be and you can laugh when I tell you I'm all dressed up, make-up and hair done...and wearing my $h!t kickers when out to meet a friend!


* Always a "Good Day" at Casa Buendia - I am happy to have become friends with you through NaBloPoMo a few years ago. I love your honesty. Keep writing, and I'll keep reading!


* Cherry Extract - Even though you've been keeping us up to date more on Facebook than on the blog, I still wanted to give this to you. We "met" a few years ago through our blogs and got to know each other more through past NaBloPoMo challenges. Can you believe that was pre-baby for both of us? Time flies! Now I have a 3 year old and your little munchkin is growing fast too! Eeeek!


* Educational Anarchy - I don't know if I'm allowed to award you with a prize  you've already given me, but I am thankful that we stumbled upon each other's blogs via NaBloPoMo. I really enjoy reading your posts! Witty, funny, fabulous!


* Goings on out in West Texas - I have really enjoyed reading your posts and comments, and getting to know you. You are such a gem! Hugs!

Looking forward to following everyone's blog journeys.

There is a difference, people.

I had a conversation with someone today about a certain FoodNetwork Canada TV show. The person I spoke with quickly said, "Oh, that doesn't interest me at all" and proceeded to talk about something completely different. This was after about twenty minutes of me listening to this person's gripes and grievances. I was just excited about this show and thought it was interesting. Nope. Shut down!

If it's okay for someone to talk about things that matter to them, entertain them, frustrate them, sadden them, make them happy, then why can't other people express these same things? Is it not fair for a listener to be able to speak as well? Don't other people's thoughts, opinions, and concerns matter?

Why bother even having a conversation with someone, if all you are going to do is have a monologue?

I asked Hubby today what he thought I should do. It's always the same thing. I just listen, listen, listen while this person talks, talks, talks and criticizes everyone. It's actually really depressing. When this person said, "How awful is it that so-and-so is behaving so badly?" or "So-and-so has been rumoured to be having an affair".

I. Don't. Care.

It's none of my business. I don't even know said person. I almost wanted to say, "Oh, that doesn't interest me at all". I didn't of course. Perhaps I should have.

The worst part is, some people don't seem to have a social filter. There's a difference between being honest and being rude.

Maybe it's just me, but the world would be a much happier place if people just learned how to talk to each other. Nicely. Politely. Courteously.

"Ewww! GROSS! That fancy dancy international $h!t you cook all the time just sounds weird to me. Your poor husband. I don't know how your husband eats that stuff. Don't you do steak and potatoes or something normal?" can easily be rephrased as "I haven't been introduced to international food and am actually quite hesitant to try it. Good for your husband for trying it".

Now, wouldn't that be a lot easier and kinder? Why bother spreading negativity? I don't see how it benefits anyone.

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "What ever happened to that really good friend I had when I was a kid?" Where is she now? What's she doing? I wonder if she still lives in the same neighbourhood we grew up in or did she leave the city?

How about, "I wonder what ever happened to that ex-boyfriend I had way back when I was a naive, foolish young adult?"

These things don't often cross my mind. Life is too busy to think about things like that. I have to admit that every once in a while, when a particular song comes on the radio when I'm driving or a certain movie is on TV, sometimes I think of people from my past.

I wonder why we do that? Should we even care? What do you think?

"Mama, what are you doin'? Are you rollin' the dough for meeeeee?"

"Yes, I am. We're making cookies for you to decorate for our friends and family."

"Wow, Mama! You're strong!"

I was trying to get the dough just perfect, when Little One noticed my arms were tired from all the mixing and rolling I was doing. Yes. We made a lot of cookies! Somewhere in the neighbourhood of eight dozen cookies! Yes, I am an insane Mama!

"Oh, Mama! You're strugglin'!"

She makes me laugh.

I am so in love with my sweet little girl. Even when she doesn't listen to me and when she yells "Stranger Danger! Stranger Danger! Don't touch me!" in a busy supermarket parking lot when I try to get her in the van. *sigh* She is so lucky she's cute. Just sayin'!

to have one's ducks in a row

1. (idiomatic) To be organized; to have one's affairs in order; specifically, to have a multi-person effort coordinated towards the exact same goal.
   

   Wouldn't it be nice to have our ducks in a row and not have to search for the papers every time we needed them? (from Wiktionary.org) 

   

The day is almost done, and I haven't had a chance to get my National Blog Posting Month post up yet. Things have been busy! I've been doing this and this!  It's all very exciting!  

Like the "Ducks in a Row" photo? Courtesy of Little One. When I said, "Mommy really needs to get her ducks in a row", Little One lined up her rubber duckies and dragged me to the bathroom.

"Get your ducks in a row like this, Mama?"

Wow. Kids are so smart. It's amazing how they absorb the world and happenings around them and are able to form their own understanding of things. 

I still can't get over the fact that she tells me things like, "Mommy, I have an idea. I have a HY-PO-POSIS", "I yuuuuv Quinoa salad!" or "I'd like to have goat cheese on my hamgurber". In between running around like a chicken with my head cut off and trying to do everything (and never getting everything done), I manage to find moments of clarity where I catch glimpses of the magic that is childhood. It is brilliant seeing my Little One making connections and formulating her own ideas and opinions. Being three years old is awesome.

She really amazes me each and every day.

How is it possible that we are only a few weeks from Christmas?

It seems one minute, I was anxiously awaiting the time Little One would be speaking in sentences, using the potty (hooray for the end of diapers!), and being her own little person. Well, that time has come and now she's three years old!  The year just flew by and though I've been "here", I feel like I haven't really experienced all of it. Does that make sense?

The days, weeks, and months have been so busy. Now my tiny preemie has become a little lady.

Time.




It's definitely something I need to soak in and appreciate more.

I'm not sure if my husband finds my idiosyncrasies mildly entertaining and amusing or downright crazy.

He has learned in the past six years of our marriage that I hate it when things are missing or are not in their proper place. Now, with a 3 year old at home, things seem to go missing more often than not these days. I purposefully only let Little One play with puzzles with me so I can keep track of all the pieces. I have to count all the pieces when putting them away so I know that no pieces are missing. It drives me crazy when Hubby and Little One just put things away willy nilly or haphazardly.

Being the type of person who needs to have things in their proper place and living with people who don't seem bothered by a little chaos is a little bit stressful difficult.

Missing marker caps, misplaced Melissa & Doug play food, and just any missing toy piece...It drives me crazy!

Me: [Insert Little One's real name here]! Where are all the covers for your markers?!?! Wait. Where are your markers?! You're missing some!"

Little One: (Quiet)

This is what I found in the living room.

I was venting about how all of this stresses me out and how I feel it makes my workload just that much more. That, plus when Little One "helps" with laundry, she takes all my clean, folded, and ready to put away laundry and throws them everywhere. She thinks it's fun and loves watching it rain clothes. "Look, Mommy! It's raining underwear!!!"

My mother-in-law told me the other day, "So what if there's laundry on the floor? Just pick it up later. It's not hurting anything. And, be thankful she is able to throw clothing and make a mess."

I suppose she is right.

What to do with a bunch of toddlers on a play date?

We make SLIME! That's what!

My friend found this amazing recipe online. What a great way to teach toddlers and preschoolers by doing a science experiment!

You need:
* white glue
* Borax
* water
* food colouring (optional)

There are two components to the slime recipe. You have a glue, water, and food colouring part and a water and Borax part. These have to be prepared separately.
* Adults: First, mix 1 tsp of Borax with 1 cup of water. Make sure to stir until Borax is dissolved.
* In another container/bowl, mix 1/2 c white glue with 1/2 c water (equal parts of each). At this point, you may add food colouring if you wish.
* With the help of the children, mix one solution into the other. The kids will be excited to see the slime polymerize right before their eyes.
The kids just learned that mixing these solutions creates polymer. They can also play with the slime and shape it into different shapes. Oh, who am I kidding? It's just ooey-gooey fun!

Someday, I will learn to listen more and speak less.
I'll learn to think first and act later.
I'll learn that it doesn't matter if my toddler's toys aren't put back exactly how I want them to be.
I'll learn that I can put work aside for a while so I can enjoy longer cuddle time with toddler, because she's only little once.

Someday, I'll understand that I don't have to please everyone all the time.
I'll understand that constantly striving for perfection will eventually either kill me or drive me crazy.
Someday, I'll understand that I can say "no" to people if I don't feel like doing something.
It's okay if the house isn't always immaculate and it won't kill me to let others help if I need it.

Someday, I'll get this whole thing called life figured out.

Little One just turned 3 years old last week and the things that she comes up with just blow me away. For instance, she was playing with a ball and then found a hoop to put around the ball and told me, "Look, Mom! It's a planet! It's Saturn!"

Just yesterday, she looked up at me and said, "Mommy! I have an idea! I have a HY-POP-OSIS!"
I certainly did not know the word "hypothesis" when I was her age!

Toddlers amaze me.

I'm in constant awe of what Little One knows and what she connects and understands. She's like a sponge, soaking everything up.

It makes sense if you think of it though. In the first few years of a young child's life, their brains are establishing and reinforcing connections. Connections are formed when impulses are sent and received between neurons. At little one's age right now, synapses are becoming more and more complex. Right now, there's a lot going on in that head of hers! It's just so amazing!

I never knew how exciting each stage of development would be. I didn't realize how fabulous and intriguing it would be to see and witness firsthand how a baby/toddler/child learns and develops. I get that feeling when my students grasp a new concept or learn a new skill. It's exciting, but it's not the same. No, I had no idea how fulfilling this would be...until I became a parent.

Toddlers really, really amaze me!

I often wonder what the obsession with absolutes is. Why are people so preoccupied about what is absolutely right or absolutely wrong in their opinion? It is really interesting and something I am curious about.

I recently wrote a guest post on the Canadian Beef blog about my life as a farmer's wife. It was how I went from city to country, and vegetarian to omnivore.

A commenter wrote:

"The animals may be treated well but you’re still killing them in the end. A true vegetarian would not have been swayed."

This is true on all accounts. We do raise cattle and in the end they do get killed. We don't kill them. They are bought and sent off-Island. Ultimately, they do end up getting killed though. This is not something I think I can ever get used to. It's always really sad for me to see the truck leave with the animals.

"A true vegetarian would not have been swayed."

Things are not always black and white. I don't feel I have to defend or justify my decisions, but I suppose a little explanation is fine. The background information: I spent most of my adult years as a non-meat eater. I wouldn't even touch anything that had been cooked with meat or in a non-vegetable broth. People would tell me to "just pick the meat out and don't eat it" or "don't drink the broth then!"

Back in the day, it was not as easy to be vegetarian as it is today. There weren't so many vegetarian options. At restaurants, I'd have either a baked potato and salad or fries and salad. Now, there are so many delicious options out there and at home, we eat meatless meals too.

Back when I was a teenager and in my early to mid twenties, people balked at the fact that I was vegetarian. They said I was "difficult" to cater too because of my beliefs and decisions I made on what I ate. I was even told once to "go grind your own soy beans" when I asked for soy milk instead of cow's milk at a cafe.

Now that I've started eating a bit of meat again, I still get balked at. This time it's from the vegetarians. Meat eaters gave me flack when I didn't eat meat and non-meat eaters give me flack for eating a bit of meat every once in a while.

"A true vegetarian would never have been swayed."

True. However, like I said, things are not always black and white. I could still live a meat-free life, but years ago, I ended up having to get regular B-12 shots at the doctor's office. I became anemic, my hair started to fall out by the clump-full. It wasn't that I wasn't following a "proper" vegetarian diet. I was. I was followed up by the doctor, who made sure I was getting all the nutrients I needed. My body was just not able to do completely meatless. To this day, I make sure we have Meatless Mondays and other meatless meals. We only eat beef once or twice a week, chicken once or twice, and seafood once or twice. We have lots of fresh vegetables and fruit. We have a varied diet and with all food groups. Everything in moderation.

Before people make comments about absolutes, it is important to understand that there may be something more than just on the surface that makes a person decide what they do. Even so, is it up to a person to say what is right or wrong?

Not that this is a good comparison in any way, but it's kind of like when a woman who has to bottle or formula feed her baby and people tell her (or insinuate that) she is not a "good" or a "real" mother if she doesn't breastfeed her child. I've done both. If I had the choice, I would have strictly nursed my baby. Because circumstances dictated otherwise, I was forced to bottle feed her in her early days. Because she was a preemie and in the NICU for the first 70 days of her life, I had to do a combination of breastfeeding and the nurses feeding her a bottle of breast milk when I wasn't at the hospital.

I am a breastfeeding advocate. I believe that breast milk is liquid gold and it's what is best for babies and for mothers. This said, I also understand that sometimes breastfeeding isn't in the cards for some moms and babies. Sometimes it's a personal decision. Sometimes it's because of circumstances beyond our control.

What is the need for absolutes anyway? You're either vegetarian or a carnivore. You're either a breastfeeder or a bottle feeder. In the end, who really cares?

What is important is to do your research so you can make informed decisions for what is right for you. Live your life and let others live theirs too.

Little One turned 3 on 11/11/11. Because I'm one crazy mother, I did this...
 I used cookie cutters to cut fruit into shapes of hearts, stars and flowers.
 Because this was a party for 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 year olds, I had two crafts tables set up. One for "make your own party hat/visor" and another for "decorate your own loot bag".

I love the party hat idea. I "borrowed" it from the Mount Sinai Hospital NICU Graduates/Preemie Picnic we attended last June. I purchased foam visors (I think they come 6 in a pack) and foam letters, numbers, and shapes. The letters, numbers and shapes have a sticky backing, so the  kids just had to peel the paper off the back and stick them onto the visor. They added their names and a few personal touches. Amazing what little things can make kids really happy!

 I also picked up some colourful paper bags and a bunch of stickers. Again, they personalized their bags and when they were done, I collected them and filled them with fun stuff.
 Yes, I even cut the cheese into shapes with the cookie cutters.


 My mother made Filipino noodles (pancit). It's a tradition in our family to have noodles for birthdays and special occasions. My Mom always says, "We have to have noodles on our birthday for long life!"

Just like that, in a flash...things change.

Suddenly, the fact that your toddler peed on the floor and not in the potty for the third time this morning or the fact that your clean laundry hasn't been put away yet don't seem to matter so much.

The unfinished basement that was supposed to be completed three years ago or the lack of storage space in your house don't matter.

The constant cleaning up after a toddler and husband don't upset you so much anymore.

Deadlines and work take the backseat. 

You have a family member hours away who is fighting for his life.

Suddenly all your daily problems seem so petty and insignificant.

I'm not quite sure of what to say.

Those were not my words, by the way!

Before I get a million hate letters, listen to what I have to say.  A wise and experienced father recently told me that he has learned a lot about raising grandchildren from Cesar Millan. Yes, from Mr. The Dog Whisperer himself.
The whole conversation started with me coming in to pick up my toddler after a day of teaching.

Me: Hi, Honey! Were you a good girl for Grampy? Did you have fun at Grampy's and Lola's house?

Toddler: (happy to see me) Mama! Mama! Mama!


Grampy: Of course she had fun. She's a good girl.

Just as he said that, Little One started whining and crying...and pawing at my pants. Apparently, she's fine when I'm away, but when she sees me, she acts up.

Grampy: (snapping his fingers abruptly) Pssssssssssst!

Little One looked up in shock and stopped her whining.

Grampy: See? I learned that from the Dog Whisperer.

Me: Dad! She's a toddler. She's not a dog!

Grampy: But, did you see how effective that was? You only need to do that and she stops. I learned a lot about disciplining children from The Dog Whisperer. It's the same thing, really.
Just yell "AHHH!" really abruptly and they stop in their tracks. It works. See? You can't reason with a kid when they're in the throes of frustration.
Me: Ummmm...I don't know about that.

Grampy: Look. Kids throw tantrums usually when they're either tired or hungry. If you can prevent that from happening by taking care of those needs,  you can avoid a tantrum from happening. Just like dogs. If you can help avoid the source of stress, then you're halfway there. Keep a step ahead. Assess the situation and deal accordingly.

Grampy: Look at your method. You talk too much. Talk, talk, talk, talk, talk. You negotiate too much. You try to reason too much. Too much explaining. It's too many words. Too much talking.

Fair enough.


*Note: This is post was meant as a humorous look at parenting. If  you get offended, realize this is all in jest.