Monday, August 02, 2010

Out of the Mouths of Babes



The expression "Kids say the darndest things" could not be any truer!

Driving home from the beach with my toddler, my niece and my niece's best friend, my niece's best friend and I were talking about how she is related to almost everyone on the Island.

K: I'm related to [so and so] and [so and so].
Me: Really!?! Wow! What a small world! I know [so and so]! He's hilarious!
K: Yeah, he can't take my family for extended periods of time.

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My 20 month old toddler was running around the house naked. When I tried to put clothes and a diaper on her, she squealed in delight...

"I NAKED!!!!" and covered her boobies.

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Grampy's conversation with my 3 year old nephew about the new goat.

Grampy: What should we name him? Billy?
Kenny: Hmmmm. How about Aca?
Grampy: Aca? Why Aca, Kenny?
Kenny: Because he has acorns on his head!

Too funny! The goat has acorns (aka "horns") on his head!!!

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Driving along the winding country roads with my nieces and my toddler. A deer jumps in front of my vehicle.

Me: (in shock) OH, $h!t!!!!!!
Both girls remain very quiet.
Me: I'm sorry girls. I don't normally say bad words. That was very inappropriate, but I was startled and thought we were going to die.
Niece 1: Oh, it's okay Auntie C! We've heard worse!

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After having supper at a friend's house, we decided to throw all of the kids in the bath (they were filthy from eating supper). My friend has two kids. A boy and a girl. Little One was swimming in the bathtub and climbed on top of my friend's son.

Friend's son: MOMMY!!!!! SHE'S TOUCHING MY VA-VI-NA!!!!

Hahaha! That's right, folks! His "vavina"! Too funny!

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We have a summer student staying with us for a few months while she works for the Ministry of Natural Resources. This week, we also have our friend's daughter (the Tween) who is playing the role of my "Mother's Helper" so I can get a lot accomplished in between work, the farm, writing, the baby, the household chores, etc.

At supper, this was the conversation we had.

Tween: (to the student) So, what do you do here? Where do you work?
Student: Oh, I work for the MNR. I'm a fish culture technician.
Tween: Oh, so you're a cook?
Student: (after a long pause) Ummm. No. I raise fish.
Tween: Like as pets?
Student: No, not really.
Me: She "grows" them.
Tween: What for? For pets?
Hubby: (laughing) No, there are like 3 million or so fish!
Student: We raise them to reintroduce and maintain the fish population in the lakes.
Tween: Oh.

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I have been having issues getting Little One to go to sleep at night without her fighting sleep. She just doesn't want to miss out on anything and lately, after brushing her teeth, singing to her, reading to her, and cuddling with her, I've been having to put her in her crib, play her bedtime music, close her door and let her cry for a few minutes before she finally falls asleep.

My friend's tween has been staying with us for a few days and managed to get Little One to sleep without fussing.

Me: Bravo! That is awesome!
Tween: You just need to be more assertive and tell her that she has no choice. You have to be tough sometimes.

What is the funniest thing you've heard your kids say?

9 comments:

caninecologne said...

hi c - ha ha! so funny! VAVINA!!!!
I think I'm going to use that word now!

I can't even remember all the funny stuff TC's said over the years...too many to name.

When she was really young, maybe 2, we were at the grocery store and she said, "Are you ready to purchase your items?" See, we never did 'baby talk' with TC. none of this poo poo, pee pee, boo boo stuff. We spoke to her like a regular person/adult and used real words to develop her vocabulary. i thought it was hilarious that she was imitating the way i spoke! she also called any scrapes she had, "injuries" rather than 'boo boos'. she surprised her daycare provided by saying, 'i need a band aid for my injury!'

Cherry said...

So LilMiss was just saying the other day.... AAHhhoohhhlaaa
ok, I know, not that funny. however she did discover that yelling today gets a pretty funny reaction from daddy. She yells and then laughs. Its adorable, but I think Eric got a few new grey ones ;-)

and uh.. can your tween come have a talk with my sleep fighter? Thanks.

Crystal said...

1-We recently bought my son a new car bed! He was so excited to tell our neighbors that I let him sleep in the car last night! Slightly embarassing!
2-My daughter had severe constipation as a toddler and received lots of enemas and suppositories.
One day she told a stranger in the drug store that "mommy and daddy stick things up her butt"
I quickly went into damage control!lol
good post!

caninecologne said...

hi c - me again -

i remember one time bert and i were at the furniture store looking for a new couch. tc was still quite young, maybe 1 1/2 years old...

while we were talking couches with the salesman, she loudly and proudly said that she "farted"! it must have been a silent one because we didn't hear anything but still, we were trying so hard not to laugh.

J at www.jellyjules.com said...

Ack! Crystal wins, no question.

I remember there was a time that Ted's aunt used to watch Maya, after her day care situation fell apart in a pool of poop and before a spot opened up at the Montessori, when she was about 2. She used to try to get Maya to sleep, and when she couldn't talk her into her afternoon nap, out came the big guns. Her elbow would talk to Maya. "Time for your nap!" "Okay elbow", then she would roll over and pass out. Funny! Of course, my elbow talked to her too, which was probably where it started...

C said...

Okay, I totally should have made this a contest. LOL! Best story wins!

Ummmm...Julie, just trying to get a visual here. How does one's elbow talk? Can you YouTube this for me? LOL! Seriously :) Bet you'd get a million hits for a talking elbow. :) xo

Dina said...

"I naked" that is so funny because M said the same thing not too long ago!! as she peed on the floor of course!
She also repeats EVERYTHING we say so we really have to be careful!

C said...

Dina:
M is toooooo cute! I love her little voice! What a character she is. LOVE HER!!

Rachie-Babe said...

:-) Love it!

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City girl moves to the country, falls in love, and marries a farmer. She tries to incorporate her city ways with her new country lifestyle and blogs to keep in touch with friends, family & students who live far, far away :) Can this city girl go country? Watch as she learns all sorts of exciting things about life on the farm and in a small rural community. *UPDATE* We are now parents! Our baby girl was born on Nov. 11, 2008 (at 28 weeks gestation- 12 weeks premature, but she's quite the trooper)!!!
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