Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Cutting the Apron Strings

Remember the movie "Terms of Endearment"?

Before the opening credits, the film portrays Aurora as a worried, newbie mother who checks on her baby every five minutes in the middle of the night and imagines the worst. In the baby's bedroom, she stares at the crib of her infant daughter and imagines crib death: "Rudyard, she's not breathing." She shakes her baby out of its quiet and peaceful sleep, causing the infant to wail - and Aurora to claim: "That's better."

I'm not that bad! I do worry about whether or not Little One stops breathing at night though. I worry about her sleeping in her own room because it's a bit far from ours. It appears that I'm the one having the most difficult time with Little One's milestones. I know I shouldn't be. If anything, I should be thrilled, excited, ecstatic, elated! Obviously, I am thrilled that she is developing so well, that she's such a happy, healthy baby, and that she is very inquisitive and independent.

We kept her in her mini nursery in our room upstairs up until September 15th. She was 10 months old and 5 days (adjusted/corrected age). Hubby just decided to put her to bed in her own room that night. That night, I could not sleep. I lay in our bed awake, listening closely to see if I could hear her. Little One had absolutely no qualms with being in her big crib, in her own room...all by herself.

I should have known. I mean, the kid can sleep anywhere. To top it all off, she sleeps from 9PM until 9AM. Why was I up and worrying? I even ended up sleeping in her room with her that night. We have a double bed in her nursery.

Day 2 of her sleeping in her own room was just like day 1. She was fine. I wasn't. I slept in her room again. However, by day 3 of her sleeping in her own room, I realized that Little One will be fine. She is big and old enough to not let herself sleep with her face smooshed into the mattress. She can also move from her back to her belly and belly to back with ease. She can turn her own head if she's not comfortable. She doesn't wake up in the middle of the night for feedings. She's been sleeping in her own room for almost a week now. She doesn't care if her Mama is sleeping in the room with her or not.

I'm the one who has to learn how to let go.


Dina said...

i know exactly how you feel!
My kids didn't sleep in our room for that long but I do get upset each and every day when i have to drop them off at daycare. i still get super teary eyed after I get back into my car-especially on days when my Dear Son clings to me and doesn't want me to leave(like this morning for example)...thus making me late for work because those 5 or 10 minutes of trying to get him to let go are crucial!
As for Dear Daughter- she is so happy go-lucky I am less upset but still would love to stay home to with her a little longer!!

J at www.jellyjules.com said...

I'd be afraid to have my kid on a different story of the building than me. Not that anything would happen to the kid, but that they would cry and I would run down the stairs and break my leg. HA!

We stayed in Tahoe a few years ago, and Maya was on the second floor and we were on the first. I couldn't sleep well because she was so far away. In the middle of the night some coyotes started yelling, and to my sleeping city ears it sounded like she was SCREAMING. I panicked and RAN through the house and up the stairs, and yeah, she was still asleep. My husband came with me, just in case, but he knew they were coyotes. Just didn't have time to tell me before I took off. And yeah, Maya was 10 or 11.

hotmommy said...

i was like that with our first chris. by number two and three i was happy to have them in their own rooms at night!!!!!!!!!!!!! {{{{{{{{{lol}}}}}}}}}

Deb said...

I can't believe she reaching a year old! I can't imagine having to let her finally sleep in another room! You'll be fine. :)

P.S. I heart Terms of Endearment..

merinz said...

The letting go happens for the rest of your life!

humpsNbump said...

That is totally normal Hun. I know that all of us new moms worry. It's our job! Since Little One is a preemie, it's natural to be a little concerned. Just know that she's much more comfortable than you are. It will get easier with time.

(P.S. I now need to rent Terms of Endearment. LOL)

~ humps

C said...

:) I can only imagine how heartbreaking it is that your DS clings to you and doesn't want you to leave in the morning. Gah...I'm going to cry!!! Yes, that DD of yours is such a happy go lucky girl!!

Miss you guys!! MUST catch up soon!

Word ver: bonut (which rhymes with donut! Or as I spell it, doughnut! LOL!

C said...

Yes, being on a different level in the house is a bit disconcerting! One good thing is that our house is pretty much open concept and we can hear her pretty well...but still!!!

Funny you should mention the fear of running down the stairs and breaking a leg! That was the exact same thing I worried about in last week! I left a night light on so I wouldn't trip down the stairs and break my neck! Amazing how fast one can fly down the stairs and across the house to get to one's baby!

:) I love that Maya story you just shared! 10 yrs old, 15 yrs old...30 yrs old...I guess we're always going to worry about them.

VE said...

...then they become teens...and you're so thankful their in their room... alone...

louann said...

I know! It is very difficult to do. What drives me nuts now are thoughts of "what if's..." while my 2 older children are in school.

Can you imagine how difficult it will be when they get to college???

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City girl moves to the country, falls in love, and marries a farmer. She tries to incorporate her city ways with her new country lifestyle and blogs to keep in touch with friends, family & students who live far, far away :) Can this city girl go country? Watch as she learns all sorts of exciting things about life on the farm and in a small rural community. *UPDATE* We are now parents! Our baby girl was born on Nov. 11, 2008 (at 28 weeks gestation- 12 weeks premature, but she's quite the trooper)!!!
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